Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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