just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
