every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize