So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
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Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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