Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
