Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Bring me that man meat
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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