Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.