Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
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Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
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He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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