Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
