Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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