we have officially lost it.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
