why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
