Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
