She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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