I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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