yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize