spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Randomize
