So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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