come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize