I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
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