I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
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