Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
dude i'm inner monologue high
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
