You're completely useless in the revolution.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
