They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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