Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
