They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
