Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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