no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
