Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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