There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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