I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Randomize
