when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
