That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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