Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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