Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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