11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
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