at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
