But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
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