Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize