an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Randomize
