i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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