Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Im part way to drunk.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
