I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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