Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
