Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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