drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
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You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
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I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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