You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
