I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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