Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
