She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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