The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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