Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
